Women not only expect, but feel they deserve, to be swept off their feet and have a man feed them with constant gratification, something that is very obvious in the article I mentioned before, the author gives absolutely no qualifiers as to why she, or any girl deserves any of this. If everyone were worthy of things based on simply existing, the concept of being worthy is meaningless.įemale entitlement is most blatant in dating/ relationships. The thing is, though, that the male concept of deserving is congruent with the dictionary definition it is, logically, the correct way of looking at it, whereas female deserving seems to factor out their own responsibility and accountability, thus turning it into a completely different concept. For women, simply existing makes them feel worthy of being treated a certain way and being doted upon like royalty. Women, on the other hand, don’t put anything in, yet they feel extremely deserving. The difference seems to lie in the fact that men put something in and as a result they feel that they deserve what comes out of it it’s a balanced equation. In the rare event that a man tells a friend, “You deserve a good girlfriend, good marriage, or a happy life” it never comes without a clearly articulated reason: You’re a good man, you’re working a lot to support your family, you’ve made a lot of sacrifices for your family, you’ve built a company from the ground, etc.” For women, that reason never comes. The male mind doesn’t think, “I deserve to be happy, it’s my birthright” it thinks, “What can I achieve so that happiness becomes more attainable for me?” Never have I had a male friend tell me, “You deserve better than her, you deserve a girl who treats you like a king, you deserve to be happy. For me-and, I believe, most other red-blooded males-this is an alien concept. Women often tell each other, you deserve better, you deserve a great guy, you deserve to be happy. This is something that can be observed everywhere. It appears women believe that they deserve things merely by virtue of existing.
Indeed, for men, to deserve something is the result of having done something worthy.įor women it seems the concept is a little different. When we help someone out, we feel we deserve a “Thank you.” When we risk our life and limb to serve our country and do something valiant that’s above and beyond the call of duty, we feel we deserve a medal of honor. When we work for an employer we see ourselves worthy of a salary. When men do a good thing, accomplish a feat, or win at something, we see ourselves as being deserving of a prize or praise as a result of what we’ve done. To be deserving, in the male mind, is the outcome of having achieved something great or performed something well. Can you even imagine a “because you’re worth it” slogan for Gillette razors? So what is it about women and entitlement? Why is the feeling that one “deserves” things so inherently female?įirst of all, I am not sure young women understand the concept of “deserving” something. A man saying it is about as unlikely as hearing a man say, “I’m so emotional right now” or even “I’m on my period.” The sentence, “I deserve someone who gives me chocolates, thinks I’m perfect, and makes me happy” (a boiled-down version of Kyle’s article) sounds like it was made for a shrill woman’s voice when spoken in baritone it sounds truly bizarre.Ī lot of advertising that targets women centers around this idea. Asking myself why this was, I very soon reached a conclusion: Men never utter the sentiment, “I deserve X.” I have never heard a man say those words and mean them. I mean, as soon as I saw the male name next to an article about deserving stuff, I had assumed it to be funny and a parody. Alas, the you deserve X and Y and Z and this, that, and the other kept on coming, and as I got to the bottom my last hopes of reaching the punch line of the joke were obliterated as a young woman’s face was staring back at me. They are published many times a week, by many different-always female-authors, but they all center around one pivotal message: “You Deserve X.” The latest iteration was written by a woman with a man’s name, so when I saw the title “ What The Person You Deserve Is Like,” I thought I was in for a satirical, funny, and sarcastic piece that made fun of this phenomenon. There’s a certain type of Thought Catalog piece that gets teen and twenty-something girls all trigger-happy with that there “share” button.
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